


A smile upon death

by Memento_Audere_Semper



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Death, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Team as Family, not much more to tag, or it will spoil the whole fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-21
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-05 11:29:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16367045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Memento_Audere_Semper/pseuds/Memento_Audere_Semper
Summary: What if the bullet has been a little closer to the heart? A small change and yet...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, so, it is the first fic that I post here (principally because it is the first that I finished completely). Hopefully you will like it :-)
> 
> So, this is a fic that stayed in my folder for a long time and I decided that it was time that I finished it. So here it is. It is a translation of my original version that is in French.
> 
> So, as you must have understand, English is not my first language, it's my third. I tried to do my best with the traduction and I hope that I didn't do too much errors. If you found one, do not hesitate to say it to me so I can correct it.
> 
> This fic takes place at the end of Winter Soldier and there is no allusion to te films that come after (so no spoiler for after 2014. This fic is way older than what I thought... Don't worry, I rewrote it multiple times because my writing was not great at this period)
> 
> Warning, there is death here. Important death. The story revolves around it.
> 
> And finally, I do not own the characters, everything is property of Marvel. Not sure if I have to precise it, but better safe than sorry.

Steve leaned back against the machinery of the helicarrier. Hill confirmed to him that the triangulation worked. She said that all he needed to do was to get out of there.

His answer came quickly. He asked her to launch the destruction of the ships.

He put an hand on his chest, feeling blood running under his fingers just where the bullet had gone out. He had really little chance of survival, that was to close to his heart. Maybe with time and the serum he could heal. But, he wasn't sure he wanted to. Not anymore.

He straightened with difficulty while the first shots began. In little time the helicarrier would be in pieces, and him too probably.

When he was up, he saw Bucky on the deck below, trying to move the imposing beam that was crushing him. This time again, Steve didn't think long. He let himself more or less glide down to the deck.

With his last forces, he managed to lift the beam enough to let the winter soldier crawl out. When he was free, he attacked again.

One blow was enough to put the Captain on the ground. He didn't move again, staying simply there, eyes fixed on the enemy.

"I don't want to fight Bucky... Not against you..." He dropped his shield that plummeted into the Potomac by one of the numerous hole in the floor.

The killer came closer, profiting that his mission was disarmed to prepare for a fatal blow. His fist punched one time, two time, three before stopping. He received no resistance, just a smile. "Bucky I... I don't have a lot of time left..." He breathed.

A hand came closer, trembling, to the face of the killer. It came to rest on his cheek, a fleeting gesture, a caress.

Grey eyes opened wide when memories came flooding, submerging his mind. Slowly, so slowly another hand came to rest on the one of the soldier, tightening to tether him to something real, to prove that everything was real.

"Steve? Steve? I... what did I..." Horror and disgust disfigured his face while he realized what he has done and what he has tried to do just moments ago. However, he couldn't let himself sink further in despair, a whisper brought him back to reality "Bucky I... I'm so sorry..."

The killer was agitated, not understanding "Why?! Why?! I... I tried to kill you! I tried to kill you!"

"Buck..." was whispered last.

They couldn't talk longer. The fragile floor yielded under their foots. They fell, still clinging to each other.

The fall seemed painfully long, a strange silence following them in their descent while they watched the helicarrier disappearing in one last grandiose explosion. Silence, time seemed to slow.

And then everything accelerated at once when they hit the water. The cold and the violent shock took them out of their torpor. But all that Steve was capable of was to let himself sink while is body betrayed him.

A hand pulled him at the surface, a body against his kept him afloat till he felt his back touch the shore. He felt himself be dragged till he was on dry land. He wasn't really sure, he didn't perceive anything apart a presence by his side.

Bucky was there, sitting by his side, catching his breath. Steve moved his arm with difficulty till he was in contact with his old friend. This one got out of his trancelike state, letting worry take the lead from everything else.

Two hands came on the heart of the soldier, trying to stop the flow of blood.

"Steve... Steve hold on... Please hold on! I'm so sorry... Help... You need help..." Bucky prepared himself to go, desperate to find a solution. But a hand held him back gently, too blue eyes, a smile. "Stay with me... I don't want to be alone."

What little hope he had disappeared with this simple phrase. And when he heard it, he knew what he had to do. A strange calmness took hold of him. The calm of fatality. There was nothing to do but to enjoy the last moments.

Slowly he came to rest against his childhood friends, snuggling the closest he could, face against face, squeezing a hand in his flesh one, trying to transmit a little warmth. Like before... Like it was so long ago.

Steve smiled. "Thank you."

He had one last thing to do before he could let himself slip away. He tried to manipulate his communicator to turn it on, but his limbs refused to cooperate. Bucky helped.

There was a sizzle while the blond explained the frequency he needed. "Natasha?"

An answer came from the other side "Steve? Steve are you all right?"

He gathered his last strength. "Tasha... I've some things to say to you...

The russian spy spotted her superior and Sam. They landed moments ago and Hill had rejoined them by car to help the research. They were not paying attention to her while they tried to organize some trusty agents.

She got further, sat down against ruins of the Triskelion. She recognized the tone, the breath of the soldier. She knew what was going to happen and she wanted to be alone for it.

"Tasha?" Her name sounded like a plea.

"I'm here Steve." She reassured.

"I wanted to say thank you..."

She smiled, it was so him to say something like that at such a time. "You don't have to."

"I want to. Thank you for helping me these last few years... Thank for helping me integrate, understanding this strange new world..."

"But it was not enough." She pointed. Unconsciously she has known it since long ago, but she never dwelled on it. Just wanting to do her best and hoping that it would get better. It never got.

"No... I think that nothing could have been... But thank you none the less. Say thank you to Clint for me too. He helped me a lot..."

"I'll say it to him." She promised

"Thanks... I think that you were what I had the closest to family... Tony and Bruce too... Thor..." He struggled to say all the names, seeming to understand the number of people he was letting behind.

"I'll say it to them" She promised.

"Can I ask you one favor? My shield... Give it to Sam. He deserve it... If he doesn't want it... I'll let you choose who will inherit it. I'm sure that you'll make a good choice."

She felt her stomach clench and for the first time in a long time, she felt tears gathering in her eyes. Nevertheless, she didn't let them fall, containing them as best as she could, doing everything to not let her voice waver.

"I will do it" Another promise.

"Thanks..."

A silence followed. She strained her hear, finding little confort in the still present weak breathing of one of the few person she could call a great friend.

"Steve... I'm sorry that we never could make you feel like you belonged here, to this time..." She said, curling on herself, trying to contain all of her emotions.

"Not your fault. You tried... I never asked for more." She could hear his smile when he answered and it was making her ache more. She only has another "Sorry" to say to that.

"Tasha... I still think that you are not at your place... I hope that, after everything, you will be able to do something else with your life... You deserve better."

She laughed lightly, feeling the tears pooling in her eyes again. "You deserved better too Steve."

"Thank you."

A silence again. The silence of the end, the time has come, everything was said.

"Goodbye 'Tasha."

"Bye Steve."

The communication cut.

She could see the position of the Captain on her phone. She began to run. She knew that she will never make it in time, but she couldn't stop this desperate hope to force her feet always faster.

Steve let his arms fall back on his torso, having no energy left. He stayed simply there, laying on the ground, basking in the presence of Bucky at his side, who was caressing his hand in comforting gestures that he almost didn't feel, but the intention was there.

He let himself settle more comfortably. "It's strange... dying..."

Bucky came closer. "You already lived it once Steve."

Steve seemed to consider that, thought about his first encounter with death. "That was different. More brutal... I didn't pass out after the shock, but because of the cold. I felt it clinging to my body, piercing me with thousands of needles... I couldn't do anything, just suffer... It was long and painful..."

The soldier cringed. "And now?"

"I don't feel anything... I'm not hurting... I'm not cold... I feel almost peaceful... I feel death crawling slowly..."

Bucky came closer, wanting to be reassuring in this difficult time. Steve smiled, turning his head to let their foreheads touching. Their eyes bored into each other and Bucky had to contain his tears when he saw the calmness that resided in this iris, but the fear too. A mix that made him look younger, too innocent... The eyes of a child.

"I'm afraid Bucky."

"I know."

"I don't know what there is on the other side... I don't want to wake up in a strange world again."

"That won't happen."

"I don't want to be alone."

"You won't be. I won't let you be, not ever."

"Thank you." Steve didn't say anything more. Understanding clearly what his friend was implying.

Again a silence, a silence less and less interrupted by breath. Bucky didn't move, keeping his stare on Steve's. He felt that the torso didn't rise like he should, that the muscles began to become rigid under his palm.

He felt Steve's breath stop. He saw life quit his eyes while his heart beat one last time.

Steve was gone, slowly, in silence, like to not bother anyone. He was gone humbly, simply in presence of the one that counted the most to him in his life.

He was gone, letting behind him a legend to the world and memories to friends.

Bucky passed his palm fondly on his eyelids, closing them in a last tender gesture.

He stayed there, not able to move, not wanting to look away, afraid that the blond will disappear. He began to search his pockets, finding the last gun that he didn't lose during the fight.

A little gun, but that will do the job. He checked that there was still one bullet in it. He wouldn't need more.

His metal arm took the security off and cocked it. Bucky watched every movement, the metallic shine. This arm murdered too many people. It was time it did his last one.

He couldn't stop a shiver when the cold canon rested on his temple.

But before he could fire, footsteps caught his attention. He didn't had to turn away of the dead to know who was there. "Will you stop me?"

"No" Natasha wouldn't stop him. She knew that nothing tethered him here. She would let him have the dignity of dying like he chooses to.

She stayed away, seeing without problem Steve's still corpse.

"Was he alone?" She questioned.

"No. I was with him."

"Thanks. I didn't want him to face that alone again. When you'll meet him, take care of each other, you deserve some peace." She shot him a last look before going further, letting him alone for what he wanted to do. Letting him enjoy this first choice that he did by himself since a long time.

She leaned against a tree trunk, letting the scene go in her back.

A detonation.

And then nothing. You don't need more to end a life.

She waited some more, collecting her courage for the following, trying as best as she could to contain her tears. Slowly she advanced towards the two forms laying on the shore.

The sun was setting at the horizon, enveloping the scene in a warm light. It could have made the scene beautiful if the body were not so still, if their skins were not so white, if blood didn't cover them.

Despite all that, when she was close by, she couldn't stop herself to think they were beautiful so. Like two statues of marble, embraced in a last hug, the sun shone on their peaceful features.

She sat close by, letting a tear escape with a small smile. After all, she knew they were happier now. They were together so everything should be alright.

She carved into her memory their peaceful faces where death was still absent. She would long remember that they died a smile on their lips.


	2. Mourn and live

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the last chapter. This fic is the shortest one I've ever written and the first one I completed.  
> Hope you like it :-)

Sam had left Hill and Fury after he saw Natasha took off running towards an unknown destination. He tried to follow her the best he could, but she distanced him. It was only a good quarter hour later that he found her trace again, on the shore of the Potomac.

He sighed with relief when he saw her sitting at the head of the Captain. He discerned a second silhouette lying close by and he assumed that it was the Winter Soldier.

Until now, he had run, but, the closer he got with each step, a sensation of uneasiness grew. Something was not right, everything was too quiet, too still.

Natasha seemed carved from stone, her eyes fixed on the blond. She didn't even seem to breath.

She stood straighter suddenly when she heard the footsteps of the falcon. Sam stopped to move when the canon of a gun was pointed between his eyes.

Something was clearly not right. The spy had crouched protectively above the soldiers. Her eyes were red rimmed. Sam understood and the reality crushed him.

He fell on his knees, not trying to get closer, his hands buried in the pebbles, trying to hang onto something, to stay calm. "He... He is..."

"Yes. The two of them." Was the answer she gave. He had hoped. He had hoped that Steve would survive. Maybe not without injury, but that he would come back alive. He was Captain America, he had survived worse, already faced death. He should have survived that. But apparently destiny had chosen another path.

They stayed still, let the weight of the situation crush them for a moment. But they pulled themselves together quickly, they couldn't do their mourning here and now, not on this beach with Steve too close to the water, hurt. They had to be strong a little longer.

Sam got up first, not looking at the bodies knowing that he would break if he saw the death pallor of someone that he considered a dear friend.

"What... What are we going to do? We cannot let them here... People would want to..." He asked.

Natasha knew perfectly what the flacon was implying. She wasn't stupid, she knew that a lot of people would try to profit of the occasion to try to find the secrets of the serum. "Shield is not an option."

"Right, we don't know if there is still Hydra agent roaming there. But where else?" Was his question while he thought of place where they could keep two dead men safe.

"Stark. Stark tower."

Sam nodded, said that he was going to find a transportation discreetly. For the moment, they would trust no one. They would keep the situation between just themselves until they reached the tower.

He found a van abandoned near the Shield with the keys still on the contact, the owner nowhere in sight. He got in it and took it to the closest road leading to the shore. But he was blocked meters away because of the trees. He breathed deeply, trying to prepare himself to the idea that he would have to carry Steve's corpse here.

When he was sure that he was more or less ready, he got out, returned to Natasha who was protecting the bodies from every menace that could come by. She hadn't had the possibility during their last hours, nothing would stop her now. Sam watched her, crouched close to their heads, letting her hands pet their hair tenderly.

He came closer, sat beside Steve. He admired the sun that was disappearing at the horizon before looking for the first time at the soldier. His heart sank when he saw him so pale, so dirty, so hurt. But the worst was his smile.

Sam had knew since the first day that Steve was still suffering from the war, he had knew that it was stopping him from completely integrating, he had seen him drag his past like a weight too great. But never he would have thought that it was so much that Steve would be smiling in death.

His eyes watered and he contained his tears, saying to himself that he would have time for that later. Carefully he began to separate the tangled limbs of the two soldiers. He didn't want to hurt them even if they couldn't feel anything. When they were separated, Natasha lifted Steve's torso, letting the falcon pass an arm above his shoulders. He pulled till the whole Captain's weight was on his shoulders and neck in a fireman carry.

Sam didn't pay attention to the blood dripping onto his clothes, he didn't pay attention to his muscles that screamed that the weight was too heavy for him, to the rigidity of the corpse he held, to the lukewarm skin. He didn't pay attention to anything, concentrating only on his will to take Steve where were the only people he had called friends.

Gently he deposited the body at the back of the van, putting him correctly. He tried to find something to cover him, but there was nothing for that. He whispered a sorry, not liking to let him like that.

He came back, repeating his movements with Bucky while Natasha ran to the van, not wanting to let one of the two without protection. When the second soldier was installed beside his childhood friend, Sam saw for the first time the injury on the side of his head.

An injury that could have been caused only by one thing. The spy understood what was passing trough his mind. "It was his choice Sam. I was there, I let him do it."

"I understand. I knew that Steve couldn't kill him." That had been obvious since they had discovered that Bucky was the Winter soldier.

"We need to move."She was ready to go into the van when a sizzle in their communicator stopped them while Fury's voice came trough. The redhead signed that she was taking care of the conversation.

"Romanoff? Wilson? Where have you been disappearing?"

"Nowhere that concern you right now. Don't wait for us and don't try to contact us after this discussion."

"What's happening Romanoff?"

"We found Captain America and he Winter Soldier, we are taking them somewhere safe. Don't try to know where."

"You cannot manage alone!"

"We can and we will do it. Goodbye Fury."

She cut the connexion and broke her earpiece, Sam doing the same. Finally, they took place in the van, Sam behind the wheel and Natasha beside him doing lookout. They got on the streets , driving slowly, avoiding bumps, not wanting that what they transported was shaken.

When he got on the big road, he paid no mind to everyone that was honking at him and passing in front. He juste wanted to arrive without too much shaking. Natasha was observing their surroundings, searching for a tail or someone following too closely. Sometimes she would look trough the little window, at the back of the van, checking that they didn't move too much. She send a lot of messages during the ride.

After a trip that seemed too long to them, they finally arrived at Stark Tower which was more Avengers Tower since the attack of New-York two years ago. Tony never put his name on it again, keeping only the big A. He had constructed them bedrooms, floors and training zones. So, even if they didn't all lived at the tower all the time, they came by often just to be with the others, to sleep, train, be with people that understood their way of life. They all came closer than what they thought. They never thought that they could like each other so much.

But their friendship was there. During two years they had found some kind of peace in each other. They became close. Natasha knew that it was too beautiful and that, one day, the wheel will turn. Death was never far, they were all ready to confront it. But she never imagined that Steve would be the first to go.

She had thought it would be her, Clint or Tony, not Steve. Not him. But things were what they were, they would have to accept it. She didn't know what the futur will look like without him. She didn't want to think about it, concentrating on the present.

She indicated to Sam where he could go behind the tower to the garage. She opened her window, talked to the wall. "Jarvis, it's Romanoff, I send a message to Tony."

Sir has alerted me. I am informing him of your arrival and i will be guiding you to a garage place for your vehicle.

The door opened and little red lights turned on on the ground, guiding them inside in Stark's personal garage. They stopped almost in the middle. At this moment, the escalator opened, letting pass the master of the tower. The spy signed to Sam to stay close to the trunk, close to Steve. He nodded, letting her announce the death.

"What's happening Natasha? What's this cryptic message 'put all the securities in place, I'm coming with something important'" He was fretting, not liking to be kept in the dark at such a time.

"Did you do it?" Was the only thing she asked, not answering.

Tony fell immediately that it was not a moment to laugh. He became serious, wanting to know what was happening. He knew for the attack and Hydra. He had contacted Steve and Nat, offering them help, but the two of them had refused, arguing that he was still too weak from his open hearth surgery. He couldn't go against this argument, it was only one week since he has been able to stand for more than ten minutes without feeling completely tired, so fighting was not a possibility. Bruce hadn't wanted to get involved if large destruction was not in the equation. The two of them had followed the events as best they could, praying that Clint would come back quickly to help.

Apparently it was not the case. But now, Tony was in the dark, he didn't know in details what happened besides that the helicarriers shot themselves down. He was time he knew more."Yes, the security is at the max. Only the avengers and Pepper can come in, the wave jammers are activated around the tower. All the windows are one way, nobody outside can see inside. Everything is closed and will open only for us. So now, what's happening?"

Natasha was going to answer, but a sound really similar to a big thunderbolt resonated. They had learned to recognize the opening of the Bifrost with the years. Seconds later Thor came running in the garage, guided by Jarvis to them.

"Heimdall told me about the fight when I came by from Alfheim. I tried to be quick, he told me that Steve was injured and..." He skidded to a halt in front of them, not stopping once to take a breath between his words.

She put her hand up, interrupting him.

"Steve is hurt?! Where is he!"

Natasha repeated her move, silencing Tony this time. The silence stretched, the spy was not sure she could say the words, but she had to.

Abruptly Thor seemed to understand. His hands shivered while his voice became weak."It's... It's too late? I'm too late right?!"

"It's not your fault Thor... It's the fault of no one but Hydra." She tried to put as much conviction in her words, they didn't need to blame themselves now, they had something else to take care of.

The god's shoulders dropped while his hands crushed his head almost painfully. His whole face was writhing with sadness and sorrow.

Tony had understood too. He had without clear explanations. And now he stayed there, motionless. He wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it all. Steve? Dead? That was something impossible. "Natasha, if it's a joke, it's not funny, really. And I think that Cap won't like it."

She wanted to scream at him right this instant, but she couldn't, not when she saw his despair at the absurdity of the situation. He too never thought that Steve would be the first. So instead, she kept her calm. Whispering while she was opening the trunk. "It is not a joke... But believe me... I want more than anything it to be one."

Thor ran to the corpse that laid there, climbing beside the Captain that he had known for so little time it seemed to him. His hands stopped just above while he looked at the redhead, waiting for her approval before going further. She just inclined her head, he didn't need more.

He slipped one hand under Steve's head, raising him gently. He lead the body against his chest, hugging him, shivering when feeling the cold skin. He came as close as he could, leaning to press his forehead against the dead's one, whispering in his mother tongue only for him.

Natasha let him grieve and turned to Tony. Sam was beside him, supporting him by the elbow, all colors had drained from his face. He was trembling and seemed ready to collapse any moment. Finally, the falcon had to put him on the ground or he would have fainted.

Tony wasn't moving, his eyes riveted on the trunk, hoping that the body against Thor will move. But the miracle didn't come and the reality set. He didn't come closer, he wasn't sure he wanted to see Steve dead. He wanted to keep his memories of him intact, not tarnished by his face in death.

They all understood and respected his choice. Sam stayed close by in case the weak hearth of the billionaire decided to make a fuss. Jarvis had called Bruce and now they were waiting for him.

Thor continued his prayers only for Steve, keeping him close. He took off his cape, covering the soldier the best he could, remembering how much he hated the cold. The god tightened his embrace, trying to warm him. For Asgardians, death wasn't considered as a finality, but it wasn't less painful to live.

Bruce arrived and froze, not understanding the scene that was unfolding in front of his eyes. The spy was standing in the center, still as a statue, face closed off. Tony was sitting on the ground, too pale, a stranger was sitting beside him and keeping him in position. Finally, his eyes found Thor in the van, clutching Steve.

He didn't need more to understand what has happened. He would have wanted too to let grieve crush him, but he knew that they needed to move, they couldn't stay in the garage anymore, this was not correct for Steve. He saw that nobody was ready to make decisions, so for once, he accepted to take this responsibility, knowing that someone needed to make everyone move. "We can't stay here. Steve merits better than the rear of a van. We need to take him in a room upstairs. Him and... Who's the other?"

"James Buchanan Barnes, his childhood friend. Hydra had him since his fall of the train. They transformed him in a ruthless killer. The complete story will have to wait." The Avengers held their breath when the name was announced by Natasha. After a year, Steve had trusted them enough to share the details of his early life with them. They all knew who was Bucky and they all knew how his death had affected their Captain.

Finally, they began to move. Bruce helped Tony get up and took him back to the elevator, taking them to the top of the tower. Thor covered completely the body with his cape, covered the white face.

The god lifted him into his arms, took him out of the van, ready to take him in a bedroom. Just then, the last member of their group came barging in. "Natasha! I got back immediately when I learned abut the Shield! But why your message asked me to come here and not at the Triskelion?"

He would have wanted to ask more question but stopped while seeing the state of everyone. Tony was dangerously pale and seemed incapable to stay upright alone. Bruce was helping him as best he could. A stranger was kneeling at the back of a van above a body that he didn't recognize. Natasha wasn't far, observing him.

Thor was a little on the side, staying still, waiting for something. He was carrying a body covered by his cape.

Clint knew that Shield has had problems, he had tried to came back as quick as possible, wanting to be on time to help. Apparently he was too late if Natasha was here and not fighting. He supposed that the body in the van and the one in Thor's arms were victims of the attacks. What he didn't understand was why there were only two and why they were here, not at Shield or in a hospital.

Then he saw the gloved hand hanging out of the red cape. He recognized immediately these gloves. He was blocked, his mind not wanting to make the connexions, not wanting to see the reality.

His body moved against his will. Before he knew it, he was almost pressed against the body cradled in the god's arms. With a trembling hand, he lifted the cape, revealing what he feared. He recoiled as if he was burned, incapable to look anywhere but at the corpse, one of his treasured friend.

Natasha joined him, taking him farther while Sam joined Thor, Bucky draped over his shoulders. They all got into the escalator not wanting to stray too far away from each other.

They stopped at Steve's floor. They shivered when they opened the door. Every little thing was remembering them of their Captain and the fact that he had been alive only hours ago. An open book, a drawing only sketched, plates in the sink waiting to be cleaned, sportswear piled in a corner. They could still feel Steve's presence in every details while his corpse was centimeters from them.

They finally arrived in the chambers. They put the two friends on the bed that was big enough for them. Without really talking together, they got to work, searching for things to wash the dead.

Silently, Sam and Natasha took care of the winter soldier, letting Thor and Clint take care of Steve. They had been able to be with Steve during his last days, so now, they let the others have some time with him and concentrated on the man that had nobody and who had suffered too much.

They worked silently, not paying attention to the time. When night came, they gathered at the end of the bed, watching over the two corpses. Now that they were clean, they seemed just sleeping if it wasn't for their pallor.

The four living stayed still, not able to go away, they wanted to stay a little longer, not wanting to admit the truth right now. But they also knew that it was doing them no good to stay here, Steve wouldn't have wanted that for them.

So they moved, gathered on the communal floor with Bruce and Tony. The scientist was bringing glasses and bottles of alcohol on the table while Tony was slumped on a couch, a cannula was giving him oxygen to help his fragile hearth while Jarvis surveyed it.

Finally they all seated themselves around the table, everyone ready to drink. Clint and Thor took bottles, not bothering with glasses like the others.

Natasha offered one to Tony even if she knew that it was not the smartest thing to do at the moment, but she knew too that he would want one. At her surprise, Tony refused the drink. He looked at the different bottles, smiling lightly when remembering everything that Pepper and Steve had done to help him with his drinking problem. He refused too because he knew that if he began now, he wouldn't be able to stop, not tonight.

For symbolism he lifted his empty glass, quickly imitated by the others. They stayed still till Natasha found some words to say.

"In memory of Steve who learned us to be better versions of ourselves. And to Bucky, who helped Steve become the great man and friend he was."

She didn't need to say more, she was incapable to say more for the moment. So they drank together. They let the reality crush them together, they cried together. Just tonight, just for one night they permitted themselves to grieve and tomorrow... They promised themselves that tomorrow they would be again the heroes that the world needed. But just tonight they chose to be humans and mourned a friend.

They slept where they fell, praying for a miracle.

A miracle that didn't come.

The next day there was explications, questions, answers, decisions and finally the end.

As Steve had asked, he was cremated, Bucky too, taking in their tombs the secrets of the serum.

Natasha took the two urns and disappeared during half a day with Thor, coming back with two empty containers. She just said that they were back home. They didn't ask more.

During one month they prepared themselves, mourned privately. And finally came the day of the public announcement. The whole country was shaken and taken by surprise.

The Avengers disappeared one month more before coming back. They got back to work, as strong as ever, still efficient. Showing an unified and strong group, reassuring the world.

One day, Thor decided that it was time that he got back to his customs and country. He got back in Asgard, talking to his father about his plans. The king refused, but the thunder god was not waiting for an okay, he was simply offering an explanation about his future actions.

He left the palace, flew to the borders of Asgard, where reality was twisted, separated the worlds. He got closer to the two massive doors that stood there. One was designed as Valhalla, the other as Folkvangr. He observed them before going to the second one, smiling.

He got inside and waited, knowing that the queen would join him soon. While waiting, he observed the men and women that lived here in this green paradise that had no limits. Some were playing, others were sleeping, training in combat in a good-natured atmosphere, some were taking care of children that were running all over the place.

Thor smiled, liking this more peaceful atmosphere than the violent side of Valhalla. He knew that if there was a place were Steve would be, it was here. He was not an "aggressive", he was not destined to be beside Odin, with those who lived only for the battles. No, his place was here, with the "defenders", those that fought to protect, to help.

He smiled when he saw the queen appear at his side. Freyja was majestic. But Thor didn't dwell on her appearance, he knelt at her feet, let his forehead touch the ground. "I beg you my queen, there is in this place a soul that is dear to me. I wish to see him one last time, give him my farewell."

The goddess seemed surprise before smiling gently. "Dead and living mustn't come in contact. Why would I do an exception?"

"My queen, this man has suffered more than he should have. The Norns haven't been gentle. He died far away from me, from his family. I only wish to see him one last time to say properly goodbye." He insisted not seeing the gentle look fo the queen.

"Get up son of Odin. I give you my accord. I had already made up my mind when you entered. I waited simply to see what you will accept to do to make me say yes. No Asgardians before you knelt so low and so fast before me while asking me to see a soul. The one you are looking for is important to you, you'll be permitted to see him one last time. Follow me."

The two walked trough the fields and woods that covered the place, ignored by the dead that were surrounding them. Finally they entered Sessrûmnir, the palace that stood in the center of Folkvangr.

She guided him in the numerous halls and corridors to a room that was far from everything. He understood why it was so hidden when he saw the massive gold door that stood in the center.

Freyja smiled, accompanied him inside and pointed to the two men that were there."You got here on time son of Odin. They are ready to leave. I will wait outside for you, I know that they won't change their minds so I let you have as much time as you want with them."

"Thank you... thank you so much." He was unable to say more.

The goddess disappeared, letting the place to the trio. Thor came closer quickly. He stopped surprised when he saw clearly the apparence of his Captain. He was way smaller than what he had been during their time together, thinner too. Beside him was the man from who he only knew the corpse and by the memories that Steve shared.

He smiled softly when he understood that their appearances came from their time together before the war, when that was only the two of them against the world. It was what they were at the core of their soul.

Thor embraced them violently, submerged by emotions. He knew death, he wasn't a stranger to it, he was old, he saw his fair share of it. But never had he lost someone that he had respected so much, someone with whom he had lived during so little time it seemed to him.

He felt Steve coming closer in response while Bucky extracted himself and let them have a moment together. Finally, the god was able to speak. "I'm so sorry... So sorry... I wish I could have come sooner."

"It was not your fault. And I have to say to you... I didn't really fight to stay alive either. I abandoned when i could. I am the one that should say sorry for letting you all like that." Steve assured him, his face pressed into the chest plate of the god.

Thor tightened his embrace before looking the Captain directly in the eyes. "I'll repeat what you just said, don't be sorry. You merit to rest more than anyone. You merit to be again with James. We have wept, we are still saddened by your disparition, we will still be for a long time I think. But we are happy that we had some years with you, even if it was short, we won't forget."

"I can't promise you the same." He said. Their attention got to the golden closed door that was waiting for the two soul. Thor knew well what was going to happen.

"You don't have to promise it to me. It is a second chance, a second life and even after the rituals, I'm sure that, unconsciously you will recognize us." He smiled.

"I hope, I do not want to let you all alone during too long." He smiled too while memories of all the others mixed in his head.

"I will wait for your second coming with impatience. Know that i'm honored to have fought beside you and that, no matter what will happen in this new life, I'll do my best to help you, even if you do not recognize me."

"Thank you Thor. Can I ask you a favor?"

"Of course."

"Take care of the others for me. I know that you have obligations in Asgard, but please, be there for them. Don't let them split. That group, that was the best thing that happened to me after the ice and I sincerely think that it helped the others too. I want them to be there for each other, that they support each other. I don't want them to go back to the solitary life that we all had before the Avengers." Steve said, standing straighter. Thor saw in this moment the Captain that he had followed this past year.

"I'll pass the message and I promise you to watch over them, when i'm beside them, or when I'm among the stars, I'll watch."Thor bowed, pressing a fist against his heart.

"Thank you." Steve breathed, reassured that someone would be there for his friends.

They embraced each other one last time before letting go, knowing that the time had come. Steve joined Bucky who was patiently waiting. Thor came to squeeze the shoulder of the other soul. "Take care of Steve for me James. Stay together."

"I won't quit him, never again if I can." Bucky assured.

"In this case, I just have to wish you a good journey. Goodbye and may the stars protect you."

"Goodbye Thor." They said in unison.

The two soul linked their hands before finally crossing the door, disappearing in the infinity that was behind.

Thor let tears fall, mix of sadness and joy. When he pulled himself together, he got back to the goddess that had waited as agreed. She smiled gently, promising him that these two souls were too linked to be separated in a new life.

At ease, Thor got back to Midgard, explaining to the other Avengers his last conversation with their Captain. This night, they mourned again. But the morning, this time, seemed less bleak.

The Avengers stayed close together. They welcomed new heroes searching for a home, friends, purpose. They split from the Shield, wanting to be independent from any form of government. Natasha and Clint didn't follow Fury in his quest to rehabilitate the Shield. They preferred to concentrate on Hydra with the others.

A year and a half passed. This day, all of the founding Avengers had gathered in a waiting room in the hospital floor of the tower. Thor had come from Asgard specially for the occasion.

Tony was pacing in circle, unable to calm down while the other just observed, amused. Sam finally forced him to sit before he got sick. "Calm down Tony, you will have a cardiac arrest if you continue and Pepper will not be happy that you let her alone to manage our little newcomer."

"He still hasn't come." Tony pointed stubbornly.

"It won't be long I think. She has been in there for quite some times." Sam observed.

"I want to go inside." He pouted like a child. He got up to reach for the door leading inside, Natasha planted herself in front of him, looking menacing while carrying a couples of gifts wrapped in bright papers. She send him a hard stare, forcing him to go back to his chair. "Pepper don't want you inside. You will only stress her more. Let her do her job in peace."

"I should be beside her." He tried to argument.

Natasha sighed wanting to make him see reason. "You were there during nine month. Pepper don't want you inside during the birth because she knows that you will be more stressed than her, that you will pester the midwife every minutes to be sure that everything is alright and that you will surely react badly when seeing her in pain. You save her a lot of unnecessary stress by staying here. You can go and cuddle her as much as you want after the birth."

Tony grumbled while the others laughed at him. Calm stayed for long minutes before the engineer got on his feet to pace again.

Clint was going to force him back on a seat when the door opened, letting one of the nurse come into the waiting room. She smiled gently to everyone before inviting them to go inside. "Congratulations mister Stark, you are the father of two beautiful boys."

"Two?!"

The surprise was shared, during nine month it was never said that there could be two baby. They all squished together trough the little door while Tony simply sprinted inside to the bed. He didn't jump in it, but he was close. He sat beside Pepper, cuddling her with every inch of his life.

She was exhausted, her hair stuck to her face, she was covered in sweat but for Tony she was as beautiful as ever and she looked immensely happy. But quickly he saw that there was no sign of baby close by and panicked immediately.

Pepper stopped him from going after the nurse by kissing him."They are okay. They are full of energy and in good health. The midwife just took them in another room to do every exams needed."

"Two? There is really two?" Tony asked, having difficulties to wrap his mind around the idea.

"Yes. James hid Steve from us all this time. He was so small that is brother choose to already protect him in my belly." She answered, voice full of love.

"James and Steve? Are you sure Pepper? We hadn't decided on names yet... It was me that gave the idea of "Steve"... But are you sure?"

"Yes. They can not have something else, nothing else will do. You'll understand when they'll be back."

Further away, Thor was smiling, knowing already what has happened. He had to stop himself from hopping and coming closer, he wanted to let the couple alone a little longer. The others Avengers where looking strangely at him, not knowing why he was so excited right now.

Finally, the midwife came back with a nurse and the two babies bundled in little blankets. Pepper immediately reached out to take one in her arms. She would have wanted to concentrate fully on the little life she was holding, but first she wanted to see Tony.

She couldn't stop her smile to grow even more when seeing the amazed look of her lover. He was slowly reaching out to the little head, pushing the blanket to see him better. He caressed with a trembling hand the rosy cheeks and the few dark brown hair that adorned the baby's head.

Nobody missed the tears that escaped him. He was thrown back to reality when the nurse made herself more pressing beside him. He turned to face her, and realized that there was a second baby centimeters away from his face.

He reached out to take him and almost stopped when he saw how bad he was shaking. He didn't had the time to desist himself before his second son was placed in his arms. He froze when seeing the too little face adorning some light strand of hair.

"He... He is so little..." He said, overwhelmed while holding his baby that seemed way too frail.

The midwife was not helping his concerns. "Mister Stark, this baby will need monitoring for some time, he is like you said, too little. He is well developed, but we will need to watch him and see if problems arise later."

"Okay... Okay" He couldn't say more, turning himself to see his wife.

The midwife understood that she wasn't needed anymore so she made herself scarce and let the little family get acquainted with the two new addition.

Tony plastered himself against Pepper in her bed. His attention was jumping from one baby to the other, unable to focus on only one while he tried to stop more tears from escaping. "Who am I holding?"

"You have Steve" She smiled, unable not to think about pre-serum Steve when seeing her too tiny baby with fair hair. But the similarities stopped there, he clearly had traits of his mother and touch of his father here and there.

Tony stopped his caress when he saw the little eyelids trembling. When the baby's eyes opened, it was to reveal two clear blue orbs that he certainly didn't inherit from him.

Pepper came closer, watching her little one tenderly, feeling her hearth burst from all the love she was feeling for her two sons.

"Look him in the eyes Tony. Look well and you'll understand."

He did has asked, diving into the two oceans that were is son's eyes. This one was looking at him with the same intensity, something unreal for someone so young. Suddenly Tony felt his heart miss a beat while his breathing stopped.

He couldn't repress his tears anymore, he finally understood. "Steve... My god it's Steve..."

"And James, or Bucky. I only saw photos of him, but his eyes do not lie." She added, crying a little herself.

"How is it possible?" Tony stammered. He was shaking more and more unable to really realize that it was his Steve that he was holding, he whom he had never been able to say goodbye and now his son.

Thor came closer wanting to see the babe. He delicately took the baby from Tony's arms that was trying to wrap his mind around the revelations. The god smiled happily when recognizing too the eyes of his dead friend. He knew that this day would come, he simply had thought that it would take more time.

He put his forehead against the little one's, whispering some wishes and prayers in his native's tongue before hugging him close. Natasha came beside him to see the baby while she was holding James in her arms.

"I didn't explain everything to you about my last meeting with Steve in Folkvangr." He started explaining, his attention not wavering from the baby he was cradling "When I joined him, he was in front of the door that take the souls to their next life. The souls that come to Folkvangr can choose to come back. Not all of them have this option. The only one able to pass the door are the one that still have something to do on earth, the one that still have something, someone to protect. Steve could choose to stay or have a new beginning. He chose to come back... For us. And with James."

"So this two babies are them?" Asked Sam, curious and hopeful.

"Yes and no. Their souls are the same but they forgot everything about their previous lives. They will maybe keep of it dreams, instincts, foreboding, but nothing more. They are here for a new life without the burden of their past. Now they are your sons, Steve and James Stark. They came back for us and we are here to help and guide them in this new life."

He gave back the baby to his mother while the spy gave James to his father. Quickly the other Avengers where ready to fight each other to hold the babies. The twins did a tour of each arms before going back to their parents.

Natasha was unwrapping the gifts she had brought with her, the others giggled, knowing that the redhead had been as excited as Tony for the birth.

Pepper was smiling gently at her before asking her if she wanted to be the godmother of the two babies. The spy didn't hesitate an instant before saying yes. The others where again ready for a fight, each of them wanting the privilege to be the godfather.

Pepper stopped them immediately before Bruce let the Hulk out to win. She explained that they couldn't really choose between them so they wanted all of them to be the godfathers.

The festivities lasted a long time, everyone promising to protect the two babies with their life, promising to offer them the best life they deserved.

Five happy years passed. The heroes were less and less requested with the quasi disparition of Hydra, the number of villains had dropped significantly, not a lot wanted to face the Avengers that were stronger than ever.

So they all were at a state where they almost lived a tranquil civilian life that they never hoped to have.

The first Avengers had moved to the top of the tower with the birth of the twins. Forming a big strange family around the two boys.

Steve had definitely inherited of his mother's traits, particularly her light red hair and her freckles. While James looked more like his father with his constantly tangled, wild brown hair and his charming smile. But nobody could doubt that they were twins.

James was always bigger and stronger than Steve that seemed to struggle to grow. But even with his small size, he was the one who was the most trouble prone, going everywhere he couldn't, exploring as much as possible, his brother always behind him trying to stop him or helping him in his adventure.

The only moment when he stilled and let the time to his small body to rest was when someone gave him papers and crayons. Their little monster could stay hours without moving when concentrating on a drawing. James had too his fair share of energy but he loved more working in the workshop with his dad and building things with everything he could put his hands on.

The two, despite their differences, were never far apart, always worried when one of them disappeared too long. They seemed strangely connected to one another, never talking much but always understanding each other. They were able to sense the emotions of the other when they were separated.

It has surprised Tony more than once when his son would left quickly the workshop without explanation. He could always find him with Steve, trying to console him after a bad fall or helping him with whatever was upsetting, tiring or disturbing him.

Pepper has had the same with Steve that had suddenly disappeared of her office where he was drawing beside her. She had found him in the kitchen with James, consoling him after he burned himself on a pot too hot that Clint had put aside while he cooked.

It happened often too that one of them would come wake them during the night to say that the other was having a nightmare. They worried a lot about that because they thought that their two boys had way too much of them and often they seemed really violent, letting the young ones sad, upset or morose for, sometimes, days after.

Thor explained that unfortunately it was normal and couldn't be helped. They will have less and less of them while growing. When they will have more memories about their new life, and when their mind will have developed enough to put aside the remnants of their old life.

So, the adults waited and did their best to help the little ones that were growing too quickly.

This night seemed to be one with nightmares. Tony was woken by a ray of light that hit him in the face. He woke slowly, trying to concentrate on something. His mind became clearer when seeing James almost asleep beside his bed.

"Daddy?" whispered the little boy, yawning at the same time.

"What is it Jamie?" Tony grunted, sitting in the bed and coming closer to his son.

"Steve his having a nightmare" He answered, not needing to say more, knowing that his dad will know what to do.

"Okay, I'll go. Do you want to come in the bed with mommy?" He asked, already leaning towards the little body. He only received a nod for answer while his son almost fell asleep immediately when he took him in his arms. He deposited him gently in the center of the gigantic bed. Pepper woke too with the new weight. She moved to hug her little boy, caressing his hair slowly. She turned to her lover, understanding why James was here and not in his bed. "You take care of it?"

"Yes, stay here, I'll take care of Steve." He said, got up and put on a shirt before leaving the parentale suite, yawning. He got to the boys' room that was next to theirs. The twins refused to be in separate rooms when it was time for them to have one.

He entered slowly, seeing immediately his son that was trashing in his bed, illuminated by the little blue night light in the form of the arc reactor.

A little more awake now, Tony came closer, sitting at the border of the bed. He took his son in his arms and hugged him gently, stopping his trashing, not wanting him to hurt himself. He talked softly wanting to wake him as gently as possible. When he finally woke, he tensed abruptly before clinging desperately to his father, crying his heart out.

Tony felt his heart shatter a little, like every time it happened. He got up and left the room, walking and bouncing a little, trying to calm his son without success.

He stopped into the large room that combined the living room, dinning room and kitchen. He immediately saw Bruce in the kitchen searching for something to do a warm drink. Natasha was there too, a blanket in hand while Clint seemed asleep standing against her.

The genius took place into the rocking chair that Rhodey had offered them at the birth of the twins. When he was confortable, Natasha came to cover him and Steve in the blanket before staying at his side, a silent guardian.

Minutes later Sam appeared, wearing a cloak above his pajamas and combat boots not even laced, holding a shopping bag. He moved to give the milk cartons he had bought to Bruce that thanked him.

They stayed silent in this room only lit by the light of the city under them. Tony whispered sweet nothings to his son, trying to calm him while the other waited around them, protecting them.

Finally between the tears, Steve was able to align some words. "You... You were in space... Alone... All alone daddy... And I was alone in ice... I couldn't move... I'm cold... I was alone..."

The Avengers came closer, wanting to make their presence known to the child while Tony just hugged him a little more, whispering that he wasn't alone, that he will never be alone again.

He didn't try to comfort him by saying that it never happened. The child knew unconsciously that everything has happened. He just needed to be reassured that now everything was okay.

Natasha came closer, stroked his hair, talking softly in Russian to the boy. Steve nodded along, calming finally. Tony positioned him a little better against him, Bruce gave him a cup with hot milk and honey.

While he drank, Sam and Clint told ridiculous stories wanting him to forget about his dream. After half an hour he seemed ready to fall asleep in his father's arms. Everyone wished him a good night before going back to their rooms.

Tony didn't thank them, he didn't need to anymore. They were family and this was normal. After all, Steve and James were almost their children too. They raised the twins together, at five, without counting the others Avengers that endorsed the roles of uncles and aunts, not forgetting Thor and Rodhey that tried to be there as much as possible.

The genius got back to his room, smiling softly when he saw that James was plastered against his mom like an affectionate octopus. Pepper woke again when she felt her husband come back into bed. She looked at her son, worried, asking a silent question.

"He is better now Pep'. It was a difficult one this time, but he is better. He will surely be a little gloomy tomorrow, I'll stay with him. My inventions can wait a day." He explained while taking his place in the bed, moving the blankets aside.

"Okay love... Good night." She said, trying to move a little without waking up James to kiss Steve on the forehead and her husband. Finally they found a conformable arrangement with their two sons stuck between them. Tony stretched an arm above them, letting his hand rest on Pepper's stomach. She took his hand in hers, squeezing it gently before going back to sleep.

Tony stayed awake a little longer, still whispering to Steve that he wasn't alone that he will never be. And for the first time he realized that he too would not be alone again. That none of the Avengers would be alone again.

They were family and unconsciously, it seemed that it was the only thing that they had hoped having for so long.

Tony smiled, for the first time it seemed to him, he said to himself that he was where he was supposed to, that he was happy.

He was not where he thought he would be, but he definitely was where he was meant to. He was happy and in this instant, it seemed to him that he had accomplished something with his life after so much difficulties problems and obstacles.

Steve moved closer to him, peaceful and smiling in his sleep, like he could share the pure happiness that his father was feeling.

Tony kissed him softly before falling asleep, mind more at peace than ever.


End file.
